You said it, sister.
First off, you all need to know that Jane is stable and no one is currently freaking out. Okay? Now, let me take you back to a time of innocence, all the way back to 9:29 last night. I was about to take a hot shower and go to bed because my lousy day had finally ended... or so I thought. Dun dun dunnnnn.
At 9:30, the nurse practitioner called and told us that Jane had had an acute episode. (For the record, this is not my preferred conversational opener.) The order of events is a little hard to divine. Either Jane bronchospasmed (aka "clamping down", remember?) and then prolapsed her rectum, or prolapsed her rectum and then bronchospasmed. (We got the first version on the phone, the second version the next day at the hospital.)
"I'm sorry, what?"
Yes, it's true. Our little bundle of enough-of-this blew out her rectum not once, not twice, but THREE TIMES last night. (It hasn't happened since and a surgical resident came up to make sure she didn't need to be sticked back together. She didn't.)
I mean, honestly. HON EST LY.
So we got all fired up, convinced Jane was getting worse, fueled in no small part by the anxiety we were hearing on the other end of the line, and called Dr. Boston. He said he'd be happy to see Jane, but that the team had to make a formal request, yadda yadda.
I went in today ready to request that they make the request and somehow, by mysterious means, found myself deflated. I walked in just as rounds was starting, and the effusive Dr. R got all Head Of The Team on me and was, like, "She had a cold, and then she bronchospasmed because of the pain of the prolapse caused by ongoing diarrhea. Her underlying condition remains the same." Oh. Should we get a consult from Boston anyway? "No. Let's wait until after the weekend. It's a holiday and the weather's bad anyway." Oh.
Is your head spinning yet? Mine still is, but I blame my head cold/possible sinus infection.
They did take an xray, and her chest and belly look fine. And they did another CRP, and it's down to 4 from 23, so whatever was going on there is improving. And she looked a lot better today. Dr. R thought yesterday's irritability was the precursor to the "episode" (oh, these damn euphemisms. BLOW OUT, people), and today she was calmer. That might have had just a teensy but to do with the ativan and morphine they'd given her. But that's just my uneducated guess.
But I did get a two-plus hour snuggle in, and Jane napped for most of that. They want to get her back on the plan, but I did request that they let her recover before they jump on that. Oh, oh! And! Jane's on Viagra. For real. The actual drug name is sildenafil, and it was originally developed as a medication for hypertension (it releases nitric oxide, which helps decrease the work load on the right ventricle of the heart). They're introducing the sildenafil and weaning the INO (inhaled nitric oxide), and if the swap works, she'll be able to get her nitric without the gas. Putting her a step closer to home.
Okay. Let me leave you with a saying that one of my lovely friends told me today. It's a Rosh Hashanah sentiment, and could not be more perfect:
May the curses of the previous year end, and the blessings of the new year begin.
Heck, yeah! Happy New Year, everyone.