Saturday, October 17, 2009

How Cookies Crumble

Oh, people.  I am just not cut out to be a diva.  I don't think I was alone with Awesome Nurse Karen for more than two minutes today when she said something like, "So, I heard you said no to Jane being moved."  I protested, and explained, and, yes, apologized.  And that's when she played the trump card to beat all cards: "You know, developmentally it'll be best for Jane back there."

I crumbled like dry feta cheese.  I put up exactly no fight.  It was a pathetic showing for a diva.

But I did get to see the space (Tom was solo at the hospital yesterday when he got the quick tour), and it isn't horrible.  A little close, but at least there are windows, and I do have an ICN friend back in there somewhere.  Oh, fine.

So, in Jane news, she had a pretty rough night last night.  I'm pretty sure I told you all that she's been on morphine for quite a while (they have to sedate babies on oscillators because if they're too active it's EXTREMELY problematic for the tubing).  Well, they've been slooooowly weaning her by letting her outgrow her dosage, and Tuesday they started the wean in earnest, and yesterday they took her off altogether.  And yesterday evening she went into withdrawal. Fidgety, uncomfortable, diarrhea, inability to sleep... pretty much the infant version of the beginning of Trainspotting. So she's back on her drugs, but at a super-low dosage so they can wean a little more slowly. When will the docs finally learn?  They get all excited about her good progress and just push their luck.  NOT COOL.

Poor kid was so pooped from being up for so long last night (until 3 am!) that she slept through pretty much the entire day.  But, amazingly, she did great otherwise.  Her oxygen stayed pretty good (between 45-55% today, and no higher than 60% last night), and that includes dealing with a couple weans on the vent and nitric.  She's a toughie, our little morphine addict.


mommatosena said...

Sorry for the troubles weaning from the morphine that can't be an easy one to watch for sure and they won't ever learn to personalize medicine that is what you and the nurses do along the way...Tia don't be so hard on yourself a family only needs one diva...and that is going to be Jane's role...and if it doesn't work out or you feel your sanity slipping away from the lack of company just roll that crib out in the hall and back to tile until your carpet square becomes available! You have some seriously cute kids! Love that pic of Jane on you with Nurse Sarah helping...

artandsoul said...

Ditto what she said. It's all a process and if this doesn't work out for you, go back.

I think you're doing a tremendous job - and Jane looks pretty darn good to me, so I bet she thinks so too!