Okay, I've rallied some of my inner resources and do not currently need to process any more scary awful information. YAY.
Here's what I left out yesterday. Wait, here's some of what I left out yesterday. Tom has gone back home and I can't verify anything. (But he is MORE THAN WELCOME to fill in the blanks -- be on the lookout for info in the comments.) The cardiologist went over Jane's echo and was happy that what she saw wasn't as bad as she'd feared. Jane's right ventricle is definitely struggling, but the whole picture is not worrisome enough to warrant more poking around just now. (I probably already mentioned this, didn't I?) Um, Dr LR was pleased that Jane is still able to respond to the interventions they've done and the medications they've given her. And it's a real plus that she's made it through the winter and flu season so far. He still has hope that he'll be able to help her. And some other stuff that is now beyond my ability to recall.
Fortunately, Jane is STILL off the paralytic (cisatricurium, for the pharmalogically curious) -- that's 33 hours as of nine o'clock this evening. Take that, Mr Doctor Scary Talk! Her oxygen is still a little north of where they'd like it, but it's the upper limit of acceptable (she's mostly in the 60s). They did need to increase her pressure a little this afternoon to keep her satting well enough to keep her oxygen reasonable, though (for the RTs who might be lurking in these parts, she's at 37 over 12, a rate of 23, and 0 on the pressure support of her natural breaths). Also, they were able to restart her feeds. They're basically priming the gut today and tonight (half an ounce over three or four hours); after that, if she tolerates it, they'll start increasing the amounts. She's got that NJ tube now, which goes past the stomach, so she'll be getting smaller amounts continuously. As Dr G, Jane's usual attending, said today, they don't want ANYTHING making trouble for her lungs. So they're taking the possibility of reflux and microaspirations out of the picture. (No breathing milk for Jane, in affect, thank you!) Oh, and she had a small blood transfusion today. Some fresh red blood cells to help her absorb as much oxygen as possible.
She did peep her eyes open a little this afternoon, but they're keeping her very heavily sedated for the time being.
So. Assuming Jane's able to stay off the paralytic and start taking in feeds, the next thing to tackle: weaning everything. Seriously. Vent support, steroids, nitric (again with the nitric!) and morphine. Here's a fun little tidbit for you. If Jane needs to be on morphine much longer, they're going to switch her to METHADONE. Yes, the very same drug the junkies wind up on to get off the smack. I am... this is... I mean, what do you say to that? Of course I want her getting manageable pain medication, but METHADONE? Seriously? I just... fine. Fine, bring on the METHADONE!
I just want her to be Jane again. She's so puffy and out of it right now that I don't know what to do or think. She held my fingers for a while today, and that was the most real connection I've felt from her in a week. But, hey, I'll take it. And be grateful for it.